50% has always been failing.

I have a tendency to not do things halfway. "All out or bust" should be tattooed on someplace appropriate, because I get a little obsessive. Someday there will be a diagnosis for this (and for those of you who think you're little therapists already, OCD does not cover what I experience. Trust me. I was medicated for OCD, and this didn't go away) and I'll pop some pills to help me relax a little bit.

Until then, I keep chugging away.

Fortunately, my recent obsessions fit in with my new years resolutions.

What are they, you ask? Well, fortunately for you lucky folks, I'm going to share them with you.

1. Get out of debt.

Since being married, my loving husband introduced me to "credit cards" and "0% interest!" What these actually translated to? "Denial" and "trouble." We've never been in a bad situation, but feeling like I owe something isn't an experience I've grown up with, and it's uncomfortable. Enter obsession. I checked out a couple of books by Dave Ramsey (currently absorbed in Total Money Makeover) and I pretty much have his entire website memorized. He's not a get-rich-quick kind of guy. He's invested in principles that will make you financially secure in the long haul, and I'm quite excited to have paid off my credit card as of today. Now all we have left is the three Bobby has, and we're hoping to snowball those away. Then we can tackle student loans. It'll be an exciting year in that sense, but it also means we're going to become very boring. We set up a very strict eating out budget (see: $0) and have very little set aside for entertainment. We'll have to get creative with our fun, and I'm okay with that. We do it now so we can have more (stress-free) fun later.

2. Save animals.

I get emails from the Humane Society of the United States because I am quite fond of furry little creatures. When I got this video, I think it was really meant as a "HURRAY! Look at what we've done! Give us money so we can do even more." Instead, I saw it and one part in particular stuck out to me-- the cow. When that poor cow can't even get up, I almost started crying. Poor cow! Then I thought about it. That cow went through all that pain and maltreatment so I could have a hamburger. Since then, I've become obsessed. I've read into animals and livestock and slaughter houses, and I realize how biased a lot of my resources are. They aren't shy about it. But even if there's a sliver of truth, is having a piece of bacon worth killing an animal that is just as intelligent as a three year old human? So I gave up meat. Just like that. While at Christmas with Bobby's family, his mom made meatballs for Christmas dinner and was devestated when she heard about my plan. I told her it was more "avoiding" meat than anything, so I'd eat the meatballs. I nearly cried when I melodramatically envisioned the little baby cow saying goodbye to its mama for the very last time.

(Side note: I recognize that I project a lot of what I view an ideal family onto animals, mostly because growing up, my pets showed more affection and caring toward me than the humans in my family. I do not expect this of anyone else.)

3. Give up a new year's resolution.

I make that a goal because then if I mess up or get bored, I'm still 2/3 as far as resolutions go. If #3 is the one I give up on, then I haven't really given it up at all, which means... wait. That's confusing. Maybe you could think about it and get back to me.